For me, an interview usually goes like this. To prepare, I envisage as clearly as I can the structure I'll give the story. Based on this, I compile a list of questions. During the first five minutes of the interview I realize that my preconceived storyline is going to bite the dust. ‘Uh-oh, last week this guy became a dad! His world has been turned upside down, and so has my storyline.’ Luckily, I have recording equipment with me: an unbelievably smart telephone. At the start of an interview I always switch it on. ‘It'll be fine, it'll be fine. Keep on talking, ask the next question.’

Promising to get the article down on paper without delay and, of course, to send a copy for review, I bid my interviewee farewell at the end of the session. While they are hoping to be cast in a good light, my thoughts are on my next steps. First, I write up whatever is still swirling about in my mind. Doubts I write in italics. Then I listen to the recording and start polishing the piece.

As soon as ‘the tape is running’ (what's that in digital-speak?) a couple of things happen. First, I think it's my sister who's guiding the conversation. ‘Jeez, that's me!’ After this realization, more useful memories start to surface. Wow, the way I was working on multiple levels! I was talking with my interlocutor and listening to them. While I was listening, parallel thoughts were also barreling through my mind: ‘Whaat?!’ and ‘How exactly?’ and ‘I still don't get it’ and ‘Not so vague s’il vous plaît, give me some something nice and specific’. These aren't disturbing thoughts, I'm used to them.

But what I do have a problem with is the next bunch of thoughts, which are unleashed when I'm doing the talking. Noises rattle out of my mouth and at the same time I'm thinking: ‘Oh, I'm bungling this big time’ and ‘If only I'd prepared this better' and ‘How can I round off this question?’ and ‘What nonsense! I sound like an idiot. Quickly, smile!’

And then comes the surprise when I replay the interview! ‘Actually those sentences are pretty neat’ and ‘That wasn't half bad’ and ‘That'll have slipped under the radar - except for mine, when I said it’. My heart rate calms down.

How about I hurry up with that promised tip? Here, take it! (Mind you, it's not an instant fix, it's one that takes a while.) Whenever you are nervously anticipating a difficult conversation, record it. Struggle through it and later replay it. Repeat as necessary. I bet your self-confidence will grow. Can a skills training beat that?