The right path
It’s a thing of all ages to doubt the decisions you’ve made, and it applies to us all. As a rule, we try to do the right thing, and doubt often helps us make the right decisions, or at least it helps us make decisions that are better than the ones we would have made if we hadn’t contemplated a variety of options. I myself, for example, am currently doubting the career path I passionately embarked on some months ago. Doubt that now also has become overgrown with the current situation.
I always told myself throughout the years that I would pursue a career in technology. This is what I enjoyed. Recently, I’ve been thinking that I may have been wrong, but I can’t say with certainty whether these doubts are an expression of my actual feelings. The situation we all find ourselves in today is completely abnormal. And that is why I don’t have a proper frame of reference to determine to what extent I’m enjoying my study program.
Maybe I would have arrived at the same conclusion - that a technical program doesn’t suit me - irrespective of the current situation. On the other hand, corona and its consequences are at the root of my current disposition. I would have fully enjoyed myself under normal circumstances. However, as a result of the staying at home bonanza, my program and its courses can’t reveal themselves in all their splendor. The online versions are undoubtedly inferior to their physical manifestations. In addition, it only increases the feelings of doubt that were already stirring in my mind.
Writing all this down makes me realize that I have difficulty finding words. I’m struggling with some kind of writer’s block, and my home situation plays a role in this too. Usually, I try to write about issues that can be linked to the university in one way or another, and this might not apply to the following. Recently, my parents decided to take different paths, and not in such a way that everyone was left unscathed. This situation doesn’t apply to us all, but I can imagine that people who find themselves in a similar situation are more deeply affected due to the current climate. In my case, it enhances my doubts.
If I make a radical decision and take a different path, I want to do so based on the idea that the content isn’t right for me; I shouldn’t let myself be governed by a confusing situation. What I know for sure is that there is light at the end of the tunnel, although I can’t say whether this is the right tunnel. That applies to everyone of course, but we eventually end up on the right path.